Uh oh, looks like there might be trouble in paradise. (Yeah, like we’ve never heard that one before..)

Remind me again how long it took for Anthony Price and Veronika Audiwhore to finally confess their love for each other and become a ram-my-fingers-down-my-throat cutesycouple? It seemed like an eternity for them to figure out what they wanted, huh.. especially when we all knew it was coming before they did.

One thing’s for sure, a little tidbit of news has surfaced and really does emphasize what we know to be true: once a whore, always a whore.

I can’t wait to see her mob-boss aunt’s face when she finds out her little princess has been rolling around in the sheets with the enemy. None other than Aaron Plushenko, Justin-Bieber-lookalike turned errand boy for the Vorshevsky family.

Okay, so apparently it happened before Sofia came back from Russia and before Anthony and Ronnie got together, but what can’t be ignored is the fact they concealed it from everyone. Friends included.

Basing relationships on lies? Tut tut. You people should know better.

The rumors have been swirling about Plushenko and Sofia for as long as Ronnie has been flashing her rack for cash, so now these important questions remain:

  • Who is going to get their hands on Plushenko first? Sofia’s angry family - to avenge her poor broken heart (can anyone scream basement?), Veronika’s aunt - to teach him a lesson about canoodling with the baby of the family or Anthony Price - breaking his face for sleeping with his girl?
  • Will Ronnie ever grow out of her whorish ways and settle down with her man? Or - the more likely option if I might add - will he realize he’s shacked up with Launceston’s Next Top Hooker (should totally be a show, we’d have many contenders from this place) and move on to bigger and better things?
  • Are Ronnie and Sofia going to fight it out? Because hair pulling is always funny to watch, let’s be honest.
  • Will you all send me pictures of Aaron’s bleeding face when any of the above find out and find him? Yes? Good.

Until next time,

You know you love me,

Gossip Girl.